(TW: Mention of “Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll”. It has now been mentioned, you may read as you please now.)

Pathetic Tears of the Divine Challenge 13

Parasitic Rat-Trap

Gio’s Playlist’s first entry

The goofiest lil’ magic show!

Out in… well, somewhere, something happened. But that’s not important right now, what you need to know is that at some point a vial of living tears and some pendant got together to do a competition or something. Somewhere else, some guy named Gio (that’s me!) put a bunch of songs on a playlist, and the playlist ended up in the show, and they hang out in this forest area most of the time. Cool, now you’re up to speed!

Gio’s Playlist was sitting in the forest, as usual, listening to music from their large library. They noticed people passing by to go to a location, and after following one of them, they found out what was going on.

“Welcome for the thirteenth challenge of PTOD!” One of the hosts, Divine Pendant, announced. Gio’s Playlist wasn’t paying full attention, so they only got “…show…magical - or physical - powers… magic show…” before losing interest and walking off. It was a fun idea, though, so they prepared themselves to- oh, no, they’re just listening to music again.

Four Days Later…

Gio’s Playlist is- … Wait, where are they? Dammit, I’m supposed to be narrating!

“Yeah, good for you. Next!” Oh, that’s Tear Vial off in the distance. Maybe Gio’s Playlist is doing the talent show after all. Ahem…

Gio’s Playlist stepped onto the stage.

“Ladies and gentlemen, boys, girls, neithers, boths, and in-betweens, prepare yourself for the perfect imitation of my creator!” They said excitedly. If it’s me they’re imitating, it’s gotta be good! They reach into itself and take out a vinyl of The Normal Album and start playing it.

“Hi, I’m Gio! I like Will Wood, Object Shows, and that’s about it!” They said in a slightly lower pitched voice than usual. “I’m gonna eat this cheese-and-tomato sandwich now! And by that I mean put off eating it for a while as I write a camp entry!”

Yeah, ha-ha, meta humor, since that’s what I’m… oh, they’re actually eating it. Wait, can you call it eating? They normally consume things by putting it in themselves like a vinyl disc, they can’t eat with their mouth. Kind of pathetic. They shove the sandwich into the plastic of their front cover as they pretend to eat it. It’s just falling to the floor.

“I’m gonna play some ukulele now, uh… here’s my new song I call ‘a’.” They said.

Huh, the only song I ever wrote was for my Newgrounds one year anniversary- AAAAGH MY EARS!! Oh my god, is that even in tune? Why are they even doing this at this point?? Please… stop… oh, it’s over.

“Hail Satan. Thank you.” They finish, taking one last dig at me by referencing the fact I’m a Satanist. I have to say I’m proud of them.

“Okay, great. Next.” Tear Vial says as Gio’s Playlist leaves to go back to the forest and continues listening to music.

“Another day, another… another… uh…” Come on, you can do it… “… another song to listen to!” Ah, forget it.

The end!

(Camp for you to join: https://discord.gg/p7q9z4tY)